top of page
Mother Baby Bonding

Attachment and the parent-child relationship

Importance of secure attachment and ways to support its development

What is attachment?

John Bowlby, a 20th century English psychiatrist and psychologist, originated the theory of attachment, which states that attachment is a primary need with an evolutionary basis that leads to a biological desire for closeness in order to increase protection and provide a survival advantage. Unlike temperament, which is thought to be innate, attachment refers to the parent-child relationship (often referred to in the literature as the "mother-child relationship").

Attachment styles

Secure attachment

The child has confidence that the attachment figure is available and responsive when needed

Ambivalent insecure attachment

The child amplifies his or her distress and need for closeness to the parent in order to maximise the chances of receiving comfort

Avoidant insecure attachment

 The child minimises his or her expressions of distress so as not to activatenegative emotions that are difficult for the parent to deal with

Disorganised insecure attachment

The child is caught in a paradox that he cannot resolve: his potential source of comfort is also a source of fear

Concrete ways to promote secure attachment

Establish clear and consistent limits, rules and boundaries

The framework should remain flexible in order to adjust to the different stages of the child's development

Establish routines

Following routines allows the child to anticipate events, which reduces anxiety

Have good eye contact and face to face

Also, demonstrate positive emotions, even when behaving inappropriately (I will not allow you to control our relationship in an unhealthy and destructive way)

Encouraging touch

Use a kangaroo sling and encourage skin-to-skin contact with the baby, massages

Be empathetic

Demonstrate caring and compassion, respond warmly to the child's signals of discomfort, be sensitive to the child's needs, emotions and self-concept (I understand how you feel. I know what you need and I will give it to you.)

Encouraging sharing and reciprocity

Taking an interest in their games, sharing values, emotions and objects, showing mutual respect and sensitivity

Loving

All human beings need to be loved unconditionally

AEnB2Up2Nq_LUjEHxux5JKrmm34VvVO4P4RB2fmo0bWEug4JtOW9LB-83Pm8ZbgWX3OP_gTZ6zuDrZWR65PXZI_xK6

Evolution

Attachment style has some continuity over the life course, but it can be revised in one of two ways:

  • Towards security if positive events occur in the organisation of the attachment system

  • Towards insecurity if negative events interfere with the organisation of the attachment system

Attachment disorder

Attachment disorder is a consequence of previous attachment experiences, specifically the lack of opportunities to form a selective attachment relationship with a caring adult (exposure to deprivation and neglect in the early parent-child attachment relationship).

Bibliography

American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry. (2016). Practice Parameter for the Assessment and Treatment of Children and Adolescents With Reactive Attachment Disorder and Disinhibited Social Engagement Disorder. J Am Acad Child Adolesc Psychiatry, 55(11), 990-1003.
American Psychiatric Association, DSM-5 Task Force. (2013). Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders: DSM-5™ (5th ed.). American Psychiatric Publishing, Inc.
Ben Amor, L., L'Abbé, Y., Cousineau, D. & Morin, P. ( 2017). Mental disorders in children and adolescents, prevent, identify early, intervene. Montreal, Quebec: Éditions du CHU Ste- Justine.
Cassidy, J. & Shaver, P.R. (2016). Handbook of Attachment (3rd ed.). New York, NY: The Guilford Press.
Dattilio, F.M. (2010). Cognitive Behavioral Therapy with Couples and Families. New York, NY: The Guilford Press.
Goldstein, S., & DeVries, M. (2017). Handbook of DSM-5 Disorders in Children and Adolescents. Springer Link.
Knapp, S.E., & Jongsma, A.E. (2015). The Parenting Skills Treatment Planner. Hoboken, NJ: Wiley.
Lalonde, P. & Pinard, G.F. (2016). Clinical psychiatry (4th ed.) Montreal, Quebec: Chenelière Éducation.
Levy, T.M. (2000). Handbook of Attachment Interventions. USA: Elsevier.
Lewis, M. (Ed.). (2002). Child and adolescent psychiatry: A comprehensive textbook (3rd ed.). Lippincott Williams & Wilkins Publishers.
Traina, C.L.H. (2011). Erotic Attunement. Chicago: The University of Chicago Press.
Zentner, M. & Shiner, R.L. (2012). Handbook of Temperament. New York, NY: The Guilford Press.

©2024 Sarah Marchand-Lacoursière, M.Sc., IPSSM.

bottom of page